


A Gunman In Wolves Clothing

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Episode Related, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-05-10
Updated: 1999-05-10
Packaged: 2018-11-11 04:42:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11141223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: "There has been a lot of controversy surrounding the topic of who actually shot Diefenbaker in VS ["Victoria's Secret"]. Some people think it was Jolly. Others think it was Victoria. Paul Haggis tells us that it was, indeed, Victoria. I would like to offer a 3rd suspect..."  ORIGINALLY archived January 25, 1997.





	A Gunman In Wolves Clothing

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

A Gunman In Wolves Clothing 

Hi all!

There has been a lot of controversy surrounding the topic of who actually shot Diefenbaker in VS. Some people think it was Jolly. Others think it was Victoria. Paul Haggis tells us that it was, indeed, Victoria. I would like to offer a 3rd suspect... 

======================================================== 

Disclaimers: This is a work of fan fiction and is solely for the amusement of the readers. No monetary gain to the author is involved. The characters of Thatcher, Fraser, Vecchio, Diefenbaker, Metcalfe and Jolly are the property of Alliance. "Aunt Jane" and "Cousin Raymond" are the property of Christie Copyrights Trust. 

Rated: G 

# A GUNMAN IN WOLVES CLOTHING

by Stephany Smith

"I'm glad you decided to come to the States for your holiday, Aunt Jane," Inspector Margaret Thatcher said, handing a cup of tea to the elderly woman seated across from her. "I need your help solving a little mystery that's been bothering me since I transfered to Chicago." 

The old lady's china blue eyes twinkled as she said, "Really? You have made me quite curious. Do tell me your problem, Margaret." 

"I'm afraid it's all rather silly--just a matter of who shot a deaf wolf," Meg said, a trifle embarrassed. 

"Indeed! That sounds most intriguing!!" 

"Well, the story actually begins about 10 years ago with Constable Benton Fraser and a woman named Victoria Metcalfe. He sent her to jail for robbing a bank. Two years ago, Metcalfe was released from prison. She tracked Constable Fraser to Chicago and..." 

"Excuse me for interrupting, dear, but is this the gentleman that works with you? The one with the lovely blue eyes?" 

"Yes, it is," Meg replied. 

"The one from Runamukluk?" 

"Tuktoyaktuk," Meg corrected. "Yes." 

"Why is the Constable in Chicago?" Aunt Jane asked. 

"It's rather a long story," Meg said, mildly annoyed at being interrupted. "It takes exactly two hours to tell and I really don't have that much time. I have to get back to work soon. The gist of it is that he embarrassed some people in the government." 

"Understood, dear," Aunt Jane said, nodding sympathetically. "Living in an English village as I do, one gets to know so much about human nature and government mentality." 

"Yes, I would imagine that you do," Meg replied sarcastically. Aunt Jane was the biggest nosey parker she had ever met...next to Turnbull. 

"Although I must confess to being rather confused about where the deaf wolf fits in with this story." 

Meg sighed to herself and said, "The wolf's name is Diefenbaker. He saved Fraser's life some time ago by jumping into Prince Rupert Sound in the winter and pulling Fraser out and his ear drums burst. That's why he's deaf." 

"The Constable is deaf?" Aunt Jane asked, astonished. "He's not mute too, is he? My word! Imagine that...a deaf, mute Mountie! Why, that reminds me of..." 

"Fraser is neither deaf nor mute," Meg interrupted. "Diefenbaker is deaf." 

"And, I must say, it really wasn't very clever of the Constable to go swimming in the dead of winter," Aunt Jane remarked. 

Meg's patience snapped and she fairly shouted, "He wasn't swimming!" She took a deep breath and said, quietly, "It was an accident. Can I get on with my story now?" 

"One must know all the facts before one can form an opinion, Margaret," Aunt Jane said undaunted, taking her knitting out of its embroidered bag and settling back to listen. "Please, continue." 

"Two years ago, Metcalfe showed up in Chicago and insinuated herself back into Fraser's life. He was so..." Meg searched for the word she wanted, ...obsessed with her that he forgot everything else. Very early one morning, Vecchio knocked at the door of Fraser's apartment building." 

"Vecchio?" 

"A detective with the Chicago Police Department," Meg explained. "Vecchio was mad because he had a party and Fraser never showed up. He gave Fraser a hard time about it and then left. Fraser chased Vecchio's car down the street and..." 

"On foot?" Aunt Jane asked in amazement. 

Meg nodded. "It's just something he does, Aunt Jane. Similar to Cousin Raymond licking the end of his pencil before he writes with it. Come to think of it, Fraser has this disgusting habit of licking things too." 

"Anyway, Fraser caught up with him at the corner and while he was trying to make amends with vecchio, he heard the sound of a gun shot. Fraser and Vecchio returned to the apartment to find the wolf shot and Metcalfe missing." 

"Now I wonder..." Aunt Jane mused, her knitting forgotten for the moment. 

"What?" Meg asked. 

"Nothing, dear. Go on," Aunt Jane said and the needles began clicking again. 

Meg looked at the old lady curiously. Then she said, "Metcalfe would appear to be the most likely suspect, particularly since she stole Fraser's gun 

before leaving the apartment. However, there are those who believe her old robbery accomplice, Jolly, may have been the one to shoot Diefenbaker. He was keeping tabs on Metcalfe from the apartment building across the street." 

Aunt Jane took a sip of tea and considered the story Meg had just told her before asking, "What do you think happened, dear?" 

"I have my doubts about Jolly being the shooter because there was no proof to indicate that he had ever been in Fraser's apartment." As an afterthought, she added, "As a matter of fact, the only fingerprints found were Fraser's and Vecchio's. And Dief's pawprints but they don't really count." 

"Granted," she continued, "There were signs of a struggle but Metcalfe could have done that herself to throw Fraser off the trail. Which leads me to the conclusion that Metcalfe was the only person that could have shot Diefenbaker." 

"Impossible, my dear Margaret," Aunt Jane stated. 

"Why do you say that?" 

"Because she's a woman," Aunt Jane replied. 

"That's your theory?" Meg asked in disbelief. She realized that Aunt Jane was getting on in years but she'd never considered the possibility that she might be getting senile. "She couldn't have done it because she's a woman?" 

Aunt Jane carefully placed her knitting on the chair beside her and leaned toward Meg. "You said the shot was fired while Constable Fraser was talking to Detective Vecchio. Therefore, we can rule both of them out. I believe we can also eliminate Jolly from the list of suspects, since the animal would have barked at a stranger entering his home. If Constable Fraser could hear a gunshot from the street, he would also have heard his wolf barking." 

"That's true," Meg replied. "I never thought about that." 

"You're slipping, Margaret," Aunt Jane chided, shaking her head sadly. "A Mountie must consider every angle. Which leads us to the timetable. How much time passed between Fraser leaving the building and returning?" 

Meg's eyes narrowed in concentration as she quickly calculated the time. "Two minutes to get downstairs and catch up with Vecchio. Give or take a minute spent in conversation. Another two minutes after hearing the shot to get back up to the apartment. Approximately five minutes." 

"That is why Metcalfe couldn't have done shot the wolf," Aunt Jane said, leaning back against the chair. "If, as you say, it was in the very early hours of the morning, the Constable and his lady friend were probably in bed asleep when Detective Vecchio knocked on the door." 

"What does that have to do with anything?" Meg asked in confusion. 

"It has everything to do with it," Aunt Jane replied. "A woman couldn't get dressed in five minutes. Let alone steal the gun, shoot the wolf, wipe away all traces of remaining fingerprints, ransack the apartment and disappear without being seen by the Constable or his friend in mere five minute timespan." 

"Aunt Jane," Meg said in exasperation, "If that's the case, then it's impossible for *anyone* to have shot Diefenbaker!" 

"There is one person that could have pulled off a stunt like that," Aunt Jane said. 

"Who?!?" 

"Why, the gentleman that wrote the story, of course," said Aunt Jane, cheerfully. 

Meg sipped her tea in silence, absorbing Aunt Jane's solution. Her reverie was broken when the old woman spoke again. 

"Margaret? Why are you just sitting there? You have a job to do. Go get your man!" 

===================================================================== 

Bwaaahahahaha! And PH just thought he could get away with it! 

Tuktoya later! Steph :) 

sasmith@surfer.pcsonline.com 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

PGEB dueSER Pretender B5 X-Phile 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

No wolves, no Mounties, no Rivieras...*why* is this my life? 

"Am I being punished?"--Fraser, FB 

  


* * *


End file.
